Cinematic Moments for the Comedy "Sand Castle Day".
The writers of "Pirates of the Caribbean" use these special moments to move their story along.
Sand Castle Day
By Robert T. Roe
- At a yard sale, our invisible Genie, GENIUS AGULHAS, comes through the front door of the house and yells out- a baby cries, leaves shake,
DORIS ARNOLD has arrived to pick up a special lamp left to her ex-husband by a famous magician.
- Inside the house, Genius breaks things, sending people inside running. Doris says to the man helping her,
“You might need a Priest!
- As strange things persist, Doris feels the need to go,
“Pierre. I don't mean to be rude but could you just give me what I came for?”
When Pierre goes to give her the lamp, Genius yells out
“Don’t do it man, don’t do it.”
- Then we meet the man she’s taking the lamp to, RICHARD ARNOLD, crusty and un-kept who runs an antic store owned by Doris.
He moves the wall clock from 4:45 to 5:00 then says,
“Smokin’ and drinkin’ time Richard”
- As he leaves the store his oldest son, TOM, arrives and invites him to dinner with his grandkids. Instead, he complains to Tom about money he thinks Tom owes him. They fight.
Richard throws a stone at Tom and it hits him in the back
Tom turns on him, telling him off about how he didn’t love his kids enough and accuses him of not even remembering them when kids.
“You have no soul, Dad. You can't remember a single one of us kids when we were young...not even Bobby.”
- When Doris drives up, Genius is riding atop her car
He moans when he sees Richard, the man his lamp will go to. Tom tells her that Richard won’t be coming to dinner with her,
“You’d have to have sex with him to get him there.”
“Surely, it can’t be that difficult, Tom”
- While still there she goes to water a group of special trees and bushes in the back yard. She planted these when her youngest, Bobby, was born but never told Richard. He thinks she planted them for the dream house he wanted to build in the back yard. In a fight, while watering the bushes,
“No, Richard, that is your dream house. Not mine. Mine would be in Hawaii right on the beach! Not on some windy cliff. I planted these when Bobby was born.”
After some more very strong words,
She turns the water hose on Richard and soaks him to the bone
- Later that night, drunk, Richard, thinking it a joke, rubs the side of the lamp Doris had brought him and wishes for a day or weekend at the beach with his kids when they were young- to remember their faces.
- He pulls out of an old chest a photo of them around a sand castle dinosaur. They had won a green ribbon . He sees that WADE was in the picture. He falls asleep drunk, then in the morning we see a boy, Bobby, shaking him
“Dad, Mom says you have to work. She says you're not coming to the beach with us.”
Richard’s eye pops open and he falls from the bed
Bobby runs away laughing, and telling the other kids that Dad just fell off the bed
Richard jumps up, looks at himself in the mirror, and almost faints
- He sneaks into the living room where a much younger TOM is, and beside Tom is Genius dressed like a biker.
“Okay. That was my lamp you rubbed. You got your wish, man. Don’t screw it up. Later.”
He vanishes leaving Richard to listen to the kids fight over whether or not he can go to the beach. TOM does not want him to go as he thinks his dad will cause them to lose the sand castle competition. Yet, JANET, disagrees.
- As Richard stares out at Doris watering some small plants, he realizes he’s still married to her and goes right to her. Yet Tom keeps the fight alive. Janet says to her dad,
“Wouldn’t you like to just throw him under a train?”
- When Richard goes outside and takes Doris into his arms, she smiles and kisses him. He’s delighted and tells her he knows about the bushes she’s watering. It surprises her that he knows and he gets some brownie points.
Then Tom brings the fight outside, and Richard forgets he’s back in time, and gets nasty back at Tom.
Doris sprays him the with water hose and tells him to go to work.
Just then his old boss shows to pick him up, but Richard refuses to go,
“My wife and her boss...they went to dinner with a client, except there was no client...”
Richard, knowing Doris has rejected him, goes to the front of the house, and ties himself to the rack of their stationwagon
- When they all come out with their bags, Doris is amused and lets him go, but as they roll along, Richard gets sick. Genius pops to his window
“And you'll probably upchuck from displacement sickness...it comes from speed…remember the rules.”
Richard apologizes to Doris for not going with them the last four years.
“It’s okay honey, we had fun without you, didn’t we kids”
On the trip, Doris tells Richard he needs to allow Wade to take the lead in building the sand castle. Genius leans in and says,
“Don’t try to change a single thing. That’s the rule. Break it and you lose your wish.
- At the beach house they talk about where everyone will sleep. Richard makes sure everyone slept where they were supposed to have slept, and he finds out something about Tom he didn’t know- that Tom is a good sketch artist. Tom drew up the plan for the dinosaur. They bond for a moment, then Wade shows up. Richard agrees to let Wade take the lead.
- As they start to build the sandcastle, Richard tells Bobby not to ever take drugs. Bobby tells his dad he doesn’t even know what they are. Genius taps Richard on the shoulder and tells him to stop it.
- Wade asks Richard to take a bucket and get wet sand from the beach. While down there Richard fumes as he watches Wade with his wife.
"Here, Turkey, take this shovel and go play in the wet sand while I do goo-goo eyes at your wife, Turkey."
- Then Icabod shows up and asks Richard why he just doesn’t wet the sand up where they are working. Richard glares up at Wade.
“Because diggin' up wet sand keeps you away from the dinosaur...and when you’re away from the dinosaur you're away from the cave woman…” he goes on,
“If I kill him today will I be guilty twenty years later tomorrow?”
Genius pops in, Richard swings his shovel at him! Genius then
Turns Richard into a giant crab just as a German Shepard comes along and chases him back toward the sand castle
“Never insult your genie, crab face”
On the way up the beach, Richard pinches Wade on the butt, then hides under a bucket from the dog
Janet, a young shrink like Lucy in Peanuts, is the only one that notices that the crab that ran by has DAD’S FACE
Janet sits on the bucket while the kids with the dog insist she stand
She will not, then Genius shows up, and turns Richard back into himself scaring the kids, and the dog, off
Janet is intrigued
“Okay, I know I’m not mental. What’s going on, Dad? Make it good.”
Genius allows Janet to see him, explaining she will not remember him anyway, or any of this
“You won't remember this, so I'll tell you. I turned your Daddy into a crab, little girlie. I'm a genie.”
“More like a jackass.” She replies.
Genius then turns Richard into a Seagull, but Richard uses the occasion to drop a bomb on Wade, who runs to change clothes
Janet:” I thought Genies were nice.”
Genius: ”That’s only in cartoons.”
Janet:” I want to talk to your boss.”
Genius:” Euyie, I’m scared.”
“My concept of reality has been ...seriously challenged. We need to talk”, Janet says. The next scene the three of them are at an ice cream bar.
As they talk, Janet turns to her dad, “So dad, you came back in time just to see your kids. How sweet. You could have had a lot of money.
“That three wish business is a bunch of bunk. One wish, girlie, is all anyone gets….and at sundown, your dad’s out of here.”
Later Janet says to her dad, “It’s become clear to me that you need therapy when you get back to the future, Dad. You’re a mess.”
Janet, told she will not remember anything about Genius, gets out her diary and makes notes (set up)
As the day nears it’s end, the sandcastle is built, and Richard knows he will be sent home, bends to tell Bobby once again not to take drugs. Genius warns him, however, Genius sends Richard when he tries to ward Doris about Wade- thus changing things in the past.
Richard wakes at home thinking he was in a dream, then he sees in the sandcastle day picture that they won was the BLUE RIBBON instead of the green
Something changed and so Richard cries out for Genie but he will not return
Then he goes to crush the lamp, and Genius appears
Richard makes his case that he should have had two days as he wished for two days. Genius makes his case that he got what he got then the WILLIES ARRIVE.
Three Genie’s show up to settle the dispute over the wish and decide that Richard indeed got his wish
With no hope to go back, Genius and Richard sit to talk and there is a knock on the door.
A grown woman, JANET, with her childhood diary stands in the doorway
“Déjà vu. I’ve been waiting for this night a long time.”
Janet recognizes Genius from a sketch she made of him, and as they talk, she lifts the lamp and says, “Can I make a wish?”
She can and wishes for her Dad to go back for another day with them at the beach, and that all the kids remember he was there…and that she remember Genius.
As Richard goes back in time, Genius and Janet continue to talk. Janet makes the offer to “listen” to Genius’s problems, and he agrees…
“I’ve read all your books.”
Richard returns to the past and finds that his wife has just left with Wade for dinner- but he knows this is the night she fell into his arms.
At the restaurant he thinks of what he can do to stop this while Genius keeps warning him not to try to change anything. Then Richard sees a cute dog
Genius turns Richard into a cute little dog and he runs into the restaurant and leaps right onto his wife’s lap
He barks and growls when anyone tries to take him away
Wade gets mad and is arrested
The Willies show up and send Richard back for trying to change things, but Richard asks if what just happened would be changed. They answered that it was “UP TO TIME” to decide, and poof, he’s gone
Richard wakes up in Hawaii. Doris is there and so is Bobby along with some grand kids. Richard is overcome with joy as he realizes he actually was able to change things. Wow!
Genius shows up- a changed man from his therapy with Janet- then they all live happily ever after as we………fade out.
Robert T. Roe 503-998-2479 email@example.com