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That Thing On The Hill Comedy Screenplay

THAT THING ON THE HILL               by Bob Roe                  503-998-2479                

Logline: “An Alaskan research veterinarian gets caught up in a mysterious Indian Legend and chain of events after taking an ancient bear found frozen and tied to stakes in the ice to her laboratory.”

After her bulldozer-driving boyfriend, BUDDY, found this ancient species of bear in the ice up at a new mountain dump, JULIET thought this discovery would put her in National Geographic. Yet, PETE, a half Indian bulldozer operator, warns Juliet that the Indian side of him tells him that this thing in the ice is nothing but trouble.

And so imagine her surprise when the thawed creatures claw falls away revealing a man’s arm.  Instead of her ancient bear she now has the mystery of a man sewn into bear hides, tied to stakes, frozen in ice, and buried under thirty feet of dirt with a mask on his face made of different animal parts.  Despite her desire to rid herself of this frozen corpse immediately, her sister VALERIE, and lab assistant, STACEY, twists her arm to take a closer look at this mysterious man.  This in itself is a hair-raising event.

On top of having a frozen unwanted man in her laboratory to stress her, the local Indian Council, the troublesome Mayor of her small town, and a State Inspector are all sure that Juliet and Buddy have taken something off that mountain.   Perhaps some sort of Indian artifact they surmise leaving Juliet in violation of federal and state laws.  Adding to the drama and mystery, the two eagles that were up hanging around the dump that are now below in town flying around her lab.  CHIEF MOUNTAIN tells Juliet that the noble eagle always has a reason for what it does. He tells her about the legend of an ancient Eagle God and encourages her to fess-up to whatever she has done.

Naturally, there is one cliché thing that the audience would be expecting to happen that must happen. The man wakes up.  Yet, there is nothing ordinary about the way he wakes, nor about who he really is. EHAS starts life again and in doing so reveals some of his very special powers.  Quickly, the story begins to take a Frankenstein turn when the mayor leads the town’s people against the lab.  Juliet completes her character arch by running them off and turning from fear of Ehas to her realization that she is now responsible for him.   Yet, Ehas makes it easy for them to see his good side by reversing time in her laboratory to save Valerie’s life.  Moments later Ehas sends Buddy back to the dump to find an egg shaped devise. HOWARD, the troublesome State Inspector, spies from the trees and when Buddy returns with the devise he snatches it away claiming it to be an artifact.  Against Ehas’ warnings Howard and the Mayor open the devise and disappear.  Ehas shrugs, “ there goes my ride.” In the next shot, Howard and the Mayor are screaming through outer space. In this fun story that starts mysterious and scary, Ehas goes from being a frozen bear in the ice, to a man, to an ancient Indian ancestor, to an alien visitor, to a magician performing in Las Vegas. Wow.

WGA REGISTERED         503- 998-2479               Bob Roe

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